Wrestling
Sean Raw Sapp (6/12): Brock Lesnar Returns, Huge Brawl, Cass Attacked, Emma Returns
Opening segment
- Paul Heyman is out and cuts a really good promo on Samoa Joe, saying none of the other Samoans want anything to do with them.
- Heyman is so good at making a story out of nothing.
- Joe comes out and attacks Lesnar!
- A great locker room clearing brawl goes down.
- Samoa Joe hit that old cheating ass shuffle side kick from WWE Here Comes The Pain on PS2. That shit isn't fair.
Elias Samson defeated Dean Ambrose
3/10
- The Waterboy came out 19 years ago, and that'll be one of the more timely references on WWE commentary.
- I appreciate Ambrose adding to his arsenal with a Fisherman's suplex, even though this match was weak.
- How couldn't have Samson scouted the rebound lariat?
- Why is Ambrose chasing Maryse? What's he gonna do? Miz interfered, by the way.
- Samson creamed Amrbose with a couple of knees and won.
Backstage crappenings
- These Goldust promos are pretty good, but the R-Truth ones are super doody.
- Angle is mad at Miz backstage, and Maryse is still mad at Miz. She avoids a kiss.
- The Hardys cut a terrible, written promo.
- We got a Bayley interview. I don't hate the direction of her being overly nice, and refraining from unnecessary violence.
- Neville attacks Rich Swann, runs down Akira Tozawa and the Cruiserweight division in a strong promo.
- The Noam Dar, Anderson and Gallows commercial was only missing a "NERD"
Cedric Alexander defeated Noam Dar
- Noam Dar confronts Cedric Alexander backstage, and Alicia Fox is on Facetime. I loved this.
- Quick squash. Alicia is on Facetime the entire time. GREAT
Rollins/Wyatt Promo
- I wish they'd go full "Wyatt thinks he's a god" thing. He's mad about Rollins saying his name in vain.
- Rollins finds this ridiculous.
Apollo Crews (w/ Titus O'Neil) defeated Kalisto
- Tozawa is ringside.
- This is a good, short match.
- Crews gets a nice counter and powerbomb win,
- Tozawa has great body language and facial expressions.
Sasha Banks, Dana Brooke & Mickie James defeated Alexa Bliss, Emma, Nia Jax
2/10
- "Hey Alexa. No matter how fucking stupid and out of the way it is, mention that the other brand is having a ladder match Sunday"
- They write Nia Jax's promos just like Corbin's
- HAHAHAHAHAHAH MICKIE GOT RID OF ALL OF HER PANTS EXCEPT FOR THE FLAPS.
- Emma is back. Then Sasha comes out. Six woman tag.
- This is really uneventful other than seeing how bad Dana and Nia are, and Mickie's awesome Thesz Press tope.
- Alexa leaves Emma hanging. Sasha wins.
Heath Slater & Rhyno defeated The Miz and Dancing Bear (w/ Maryse)
3.5/10
- Miz tries to recruit Heath Slater backstage, but Slater wants a title shot. They'll have a tag match instead, with Miz finding a partner.
- It's the dancing bear!! It gets a great ovation.
- It wasn't Dean Ambrose, after Miz attacks.
- A second bear comes in and hits Dirty Deeds, but then Miz runs into Maryse. She mad.
- Dirty Deeds on Miz. Ambrose puts Slater on Miz.
Anderson & Gallows defeated Enzo and Cass
- Cass is laid out again, and The Revival are in the background scampering away.
- Cass puts up a valiant effort and sells his previous injury well.
- Anderson and Gallows recover and beat Enzo and Cass.
- Big Show makes the save after the match. Cass sees and he's not happy.
- Enzo asks Show if he did it. Great promo work from Enzo.
WWE Raw Tag Team Championship
2 out of 3 falls
Sheamus & Cesaro (c) drew The Hardy Boyz
5.5/10
- Super quick pinfall from Sheamus
- A commercial break at 10:55 EST
- For Matt Hardy's physical limitations, he's learned to adapt and work through them.
- Twist of Fate, 1-1.
- Sheamus hits that SICK knee. That should be his finish.
- I love a tag title match being the main event. Why not? It's a damn title.
- The match breaks down after a Swanton and the ref counts both teams out.