Mid-Week Wrestling Wrap-Up 10-12: Hoodie Life
Welcome to the Mid-Week Wrestling Wrap-Up.
Seriously Abridged and Severely Belated Edition
Before tonight’s action, let’s revisit what happened last week,
and get all caught up for the week ahead.
NXT
RIP Glorious 10.
You Were Too Beautiful For This Life.
The possibilities for Dillinger & Roode together were numerous and potentially AMAZING.
The way they one-upped each other with their entrances, getting the crowd to chant for them to try and best each other: Brilliant.
It’s hard to imagine a serious, potentially permanent tag team featuring two guys that are more individually over with the crowd with these two.
I thought this thing had legs. You could easily get at least six weeks out of this team before their eventual break-up and feud.
Instead we get this …
Hoodie Rats.
Sanity comes out, and I’m being told I’m legally required to type it out as SAnitY for some reason, but anyway, we get the debut of a brand new faction, hooded and dressed in many layers (fall weather is here, folks, and with it, the new fall fashions!), walking slowly through the machined fog and looking like something out of a heavily focus grouped nightmare.
Their entrance music sounds like Primus on bath salts, and two of these hooded figures turn out to be NXT jobbers extraordinaire, Alexander Wolfe and Sawyer Fulton.
And as soon as the bell rings, they go about DESTROYING poor Tye Dillinger.
At one point, Bobby Roode almost gets in the ring to help his tag team partner, but decides against it, discretion being the better part of valor, and all that.
He never even takes his robe off.
Dillinger is left abandoned, beaten and bruised in the ring, reaching out for his partner.
And then he is laid out by Fulton and Wolfe (which sounds like a show on TNT about frat buddies who open a fraudulent plastic surgery office), who have a legitimately very cool tag team finisher:
Then after the match, the other two members of the faction are revealed and HOLY SHIT:
So Sanity (sorry. SAnitY) consists of Eric Young, Nikki Cross, and Fulton & Wolfe.
This is so great. I mean, just the idea of an intergender faction on the DEVELOPMENTAL brand, when they can’t seem to figure out how to do that on the main roster, that’s cool enough.
But this is EXACTLY how you put together a heel faction. A giant crazy guy and a slightly smaller crazy guy as the tag team, a veteran mouthpiece (who might actually be crazier than the first two put together) and a tiny spitfire of a female tasmanian devil to put the women’s division on notice.
Wolfe and Fulton aren’t ever going to wow anyone with their promos. Fine. Have E.Y. do all the talking. Nikki Cross writes some checks that her ass can’t cash? Fine. Send in Fulton & Wolfe to combination-Powerslam-Suplex the problem straight through the canvas.
If they decide to take the long view with these four, I could easily see them holding all three championships simultaneously by this time next year.
SAnitY is already my jam, and they just got here.
And what’s even better about the developments from this segment:
WE’RE GETTING A TYE DILLINGER VS BOBBY ROODE MATCH IN TORONTO.
Is it November 19th yet?
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Quick Thoughts on the rest of the Episode before we get to the end:
The only thing wrong with TM-61 is their name.
Change it.
They’re legitimately great and they might be the de facto favorites for their half of the Dusty Classic bracket now that Riddick Moss dumped Hideo Itami on his head.
I’m never going to forgive Moss for depriving us of Itami & Ibushi tag matches, but color me intrigued about Moss and Sabbatelli as a team.
They’re never going to set the world on fire, but they could be great musclebound henchmen for a Tyler Breeze mid-card heel push.
Which I am now going to silently fantasy book in my mind for the next five minutes.
Go about your business.
This Australian Re-Make of Mean Girls is pretty funny, you guys.
Needs more Tina Fey, though.
In all seriousness, I like Australian Psylocke and Australian Poison Ivy as the new wave Evil Emma & Dana Brooke, but they need someone better than Liv Morgan to be feuding with.
Beef up, ladies. Never beef down.
However, if the beatdowns continue and Liv has to find a partner, and she selects the woman on the roster who can eff up some rudo ladies from Down Under with one MMA-Gloved hand tied behind her back, count me all in.
Liv Morgan & Daria Berenato vs Billie Kay & Peyton Royce.
I’d be down for that.
At least give it a shot.
Better than Mini-Mella getting her ass handed to her every week.
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And finally …
The Continued Booking of Shinsuke Nakamura as Goddamned Superman.
First of all, we can all agree that Buddy Murphy is far more talented than Wesley Blake, yes?
Their grudge match was interrupted by Samoa Joe, who performed non-invasive spinal surgery on both men, then called out William Regal as only Joe can:
Of course, then Shinsuke came out, took off a neck brace that he apparently doesn’t need, and attacked Samoa Joe, getting the better of not only him, but about a dozen performance center dudes dressed in black polos.
A few weeks ago, Joe spiked Nak onto the steel steps, and he was stretchered out of the arena.
Now? He’s perfectly fine. None the worse for wear.
And he just took all the drama out of this feud, or any feud he could ever have in NXT. If super-pissed off rage-Hulk Samoa Joe can’t hurt him, what hope do the rest of these poor bastards have?
This may be blasphemous to even suggest, but Shinsuke Nakamura is Roman Reigns.
He’s way better in the ring, way more interesting to watch, and just a better performer all around, but, MAN.
If you hate Roman Reigns because you think he’s over-protected by the bookers, got pushed to the moon way too fast, never sells anything and is seemingly invincible, then you have to hate Shinsuke Nakamura for the same reasons.
If you hate Roman Reigns because he’s a smarmy jerk who tells terrible wooden jokes and crashes weddings and family slideshows, then by all means, go right ahead and keep loving Nakamura.
And I’m not saying I hate Shinsuke. Far from it. I just wish he could show a little vulnerability every now and then.
Especially in the face of this guy:
Because that guy has laid waste to the entire roster.
And if you do this to him:
Then, by simple algebra, no one else on the roster even has a CHANCE.
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Lucha Underground
Last week’s episode was just plain fun. No crazy intrigue revolving around ninjas or teleporting murder photos or immortality lady-medallions.
Just fun matches, featuring:
Son of Havoc and Mascarita Sagrada coming to the ring in bad ass fashion:
Only to lose to Famous B (who was wrestling in a full suit, BTW) and Dr. Wagner, Jr.
That feud continues, I am sure.
Also, Sexy Star came to the ring for her match with Jack Evans dressed like a damn She-Ra Villain:
And, despite the usual shenanigans from Johnny Mundo and Company, and with a little help from her Super Friends, Sexy Star picked up the win via Kendo Stick to the nards.
Because in The Temple, turnabout, is most definitely fair play.
And then, in the main event, we had a triple threat match, and a damn fine one at that.
Earlier in the night, Chavo beat Dragon Azteca half to death with a steel chair and Rey Mysterio found him crumpled in a heap.
This led to Chavo demanding his rightful match with Pentagon and Rey demanding a grudge match with Chavo. So Dario made it a 3-Way Dance, and it was frickin’ GREAT.
You can watch the whole thing right here:
After Pentagon picks up the victory, the episode ends with Chavo going to town on Rey Mysterio (and the ref!) with a steel chair.
You never can trust a Guerrero.
Seriously excited for tonight, though.
Prince Puma vs Mil Muertes is gonna be LIT.
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And now very quickly, lets check on what’s going on with
TNA
Until Next Time, I’ve Been Alex Pawlowski
and this is me fantasy booking that Tyler Breeze heel push.
You can follow me on Twitter @pawlowskithe4th
