Wrestling

CruiserWeight Classic Bracket Analysis Bonanza!: PART FOUR

Alex PawlowskiJuly 13, 2016, 7:32 pm

Previously on Fightful’s GIGANTIC CWC PREVIEW EXTRAVAGANZA, we got to know Kota Ibushi and his penchant for fighting inanimate objects in 5 Star Matches, as well as Brian Kendrick, who believes that Obama is a lizard-man.

First of all, God Bless you for sticking around this long.

And if you somehow missed Parts 1 through 3, you can find them here (Part 1), here (Part 2) and here (Part 3).

Once again, follow along at home with your own bracket.

Now let’s take it home.

Bottom Right Quadrant: The Swannee River Region

TJ Perkins vs Da Mack

TJ Perkins has an even better story than Brian Kendrick, and not just because it contains less references to 9/11 holograms and illuminati eyeball collectors. He started out as a teenage luchador, was homeless for a while, portrayed Manik on TNA, and after some fits and starts back in 2009, is finally starring in a WWE ring at the age of 31.

And dude, what the hell took them so long?

Here he is against Jeff Cobb, and if that name sounds familiar, he plays this guy on Lucha Underground:

And here is Perkins facing off against freaking SABU.

These matches don’t even do him justice so I’m linking to one of those “Top __ Moves of” videos which I know are kind of obnoxious, especially since TJ Perkins has a “Top 75 Moves” video. But I’ve cued it to just show you the top 13 moves, which are all pretty darn awesome.

He’s pretty darn awesome, and he’s got a story the ‘E can sell the crap out of. He deserves an NXT contract when this is all over.

Da Mack is a black dude from Germany who trained under Cesaro and who is going to lose this match to TJ Perkins.

Pick: TJ Perkins

Skipping Gargano vs Ciampa and saving it for last, but you’ll see why in a sec.

Mustafa Ali vs Lince Dorado
Rich Swann vs Jason Lee

Okay, so I’m just fantasy booking here.

I’m disregarding Mustafa and Jason right off the bat, because in my research for this piece, I came across a video of Rich Swann wrestling Lince Dorado in 2014, in front of 17 people in a high school gym, and I want to see this happen in a WWE Ring. However this goes down, just make it happen.

Lince Dorado means “Golden Lynx.” He is a masked Luchador who has “Meow” written across his butt. He enters to the Meow Mix commercial theme song. He is very good in the ring.

Rich Swann enters to Lionel Richie’s “All Night Long,” dancing his way into the ring and into your hearts. He does not have “Meow” written across his butt, but he does have little wings on his hips. So, y’know, to each his own.

Swann has an equally amazing story to TJ Perkins. He lost his dad when he was 12 and his mom when he was 16. He says wrestling saved his life. I love this guy, and I think the rest of you will too.

Picks: Lince Dorado and Rich Swann

Johnny Gargano vs Tommaso Ciampa

Here we go, people. This match is easily going to be the best of the first round.

Why? Because these two have history. They already have an IRL and an WWE-canon friendship.

I honestly don’t know who will win, but I don’t think it matters and I’ll tell you why:

They’re turning one of these two guys heel, they’re using this tournament matchup to do it, and they’re going to solidify the NXT midcard with this rivalry for the rest of 2016. Look for the blow off match to happen at Takeover: London in December.

Why do I think they’re going to do this? Well, remember, there’s no committee choosing this field based on strength of schedule or RPI like with March Madness. The competitors aren’t seeded or anything; Kota Ibushi isn’t a 1 seed and Anthony Bennett’s Hi Top Fade’s Hi Top Shutter Shades aren’t a 16 seed. These guys were seeded according to how the brass wanted to see the tournament shake out. They made sure that Brian Kendrick wouldn’t face anyone too tough until Round 3. They made sure that Zack Sabre and Noam Dar would match up at some point along the way. If they wanted Ciampa and Gargano to wrestle each other, they could have had them meet in the final four.

But they didn’t.

They’re wrestling in the FIRST. ROUND. So one of them moves on, and the other doesn’t, right off the bat. That might sow the seeds of dissension, might it not? Especially if they start out kind of taking it easy on each other, and then one of them snaps and starts working a little stiff. So the other one ups his game, and ends up winning. The loser, though, doesn’t take the loss well, and attacks the winner in the back, costing him his 2^nd Round matchup.

(Maybe we even see one of these new Cruiserweight Alternates step in to replace him.)

And at that point, the heel turn is complete, and there’s a grudge that can sustain for a very long while.

So who’s the heel and who’s the face? Well, if only because that damn “Johnny Wrestling” chant is so ridiculously over with the Full Sail crowd, I’m going to say you have Ciampa turn heel. Maybe he even “breaks Gargano’s arm” with that back bridging Fujiwara Armbar of his.

I mean, it is still wrestling, y’know? There’s always an angle.

Pick: Gargano wins, but when he goes for the “good match” handshake, Ciampa cements the heel turn, and kayfabe injures Gargano, putting him on the shelf through the rest of the tournament.

2^nd Round:

TJ Perkins over Injury Replacement X

I hope it’s either the Samurai looking dude, or the guy who looks like a cyborg.

Either way, TJ Perkins in a romp.

Rich Swann over Lince Dorado

These two actually used to be Tag Team partners, so you know they work great together. I think Swann gets the rub from his old buddy Dorado.

REGIONAL FINAL:

I think a lot of people were picking Johnny Gargano all the way to the finals because they figured that HHH would want to push one of his guys; someone already signed to NXT.

But everyone forgets that Rich Swann is an NXT guy. He’s had two matches, one against Baron Corbin, when he turned a backbody drop sell into a damn 450 splash.

LIKE A BOSS.

And another, against Finn Balor, where he acquitted himself very well.

This dude is crazy athletic.

But the NXT audience hasn’t had a chance to bond with him yet, to really get to know Rich Swann.

What a perfect opportunity.

I think this is a fantastic match, and Rich Swann pulls something insane out of his back pocket to take the win. Then hopefully HHH signs Perkins, and he and Swann begin a one-upsmanship program, competing against each other to see who is the best and the baddest in NXT. I’d pop so hard for that.

Rich Swann over TJ Perkins

FINAL FOUR MATCHUPS:

Zack Sabre Jr. over Akira Tozawa

These two faced each other at a PWG event back in January.

Watch highlights of it here.

Now tell me you don’t want to see that in a WWE Ring.

Pick: Sabre goes over, but Tozawa nearly kills him.

I CAN’T WAIT.

Kota Ibushi over Rich Swann

Kota Ibushi is just too good for Rich Swann. Oh, he’ll get some licks in, get the crowd on his side, and force Ibushi to work heel, but Ibushi is one of the Top Five Pound for Pound Wrestlers in the World, and Rich just ain’t that.