The NXT Report Card (5/23/18): Less Is Always More
It’s the start of a brand new year for the NXT Report Card as Joe tackles the latest chapter in the Johnny Gargano/Tommaso Ciampa saga.
It’s exciting times here in the Report Card offices and just a day after the very first 205 Live edition, it’s time to return to my bread and butter. Not Total Divas or the Alexa Bliss Network Collection, oh no. I am of course talking about Hunter’s beloved outlaw promotion: National Xtreme Tussling (NXT for short). As many of you will know, last week was our anniversary edition but with a whole new year now in front of us, it’s time to fight desperately as I look to maintain my marvelous mediocrity.
From what I know, this week’s NXT isn’t a particularly stacked one. However, I do expect great fun from the team of Ricochet and Velveteen as they look to conquer the great Lars. Other than that, I have no idea what’s happening which frankly, bodes very well for my chances of keeping this series embarrassingly bad. Either way, let’s head to Full Sail.
DISCLAIMER: any wild predictions I make that you disagree with will likely be proven completely wrong in the coming weeks, months and years anyway so don’t worry too much. Basically, take everything you read from this point forward with a grain of salt as its credibility is preposterously low.
Heavy Machinery
We get things started in ideal fashion: with Heavy Machinery in all their glory. On the other hand, Jonathan Coachman is here and he informs us that these “are his guys.” Very scary. Thankfully, Otis was growling here early but Thorne wasn't fazed, using his speed until Dozovic snatched his arm, bringing Tucker in for a double shoulder tackle. Thorne quickly scurried to Miller but he didn't have much success either, getting isolated in the corner before Thorne was battering rammed into his great balls of fire.
In one swift move though, TM61 turned things around and took control, working over Tucker for a sustained period. Eventually, Knight suplexed both and brought in Otis who ran wild on both, before staring at the camera with a frankly haunting smile. The big caterpillar followed but Thorne saved Miller and evaded Knight too, leaving Dozovic all alone. He threw Miller nonetheless and went up for a Vader Bomb. He then grabbed the Aussie lads towel, wiped himself down and threw it behind him
However, as the referee tended to that towel, Thorne kicked Otis in the face and Miller rolled him up with his feet on the ropes. This match was incredibly fun and Machinery was absolutely perfect in their role here. They couldn't have been better opponents for the recently turned TM61 and in that way, did their job beautifully. The perfect way to make TM61’s alignment clear.
Grade: A*
TM61
I was very intrigued to see how TM61 worked as villains here and my conclusion is that this was a very encouraging outing. I loved the cut-off of sorts, with Miller making a smooth tag that allowed Thorne to come in with a massive European uppercut. This furthers something that I’ve touched on before as both guys continue to separate themselves from each other in-ring. As heels, it seems that Thorne will be bringing much of the aggression whilst Miller plays a more traditional, sneaky heel.
With that in mind though, the heat segment brought mixed results for me. It went back and forth between meandering and intense in a fashion that underwhelmed me slightly. Thorne’s vicious lariat to the back of Knight’s head helped though and so did the European uppercut that followed. The finish was just the icing on the cake for these two and this all bodes well for them as a heel duo.
Grade: B+
After this, Bianca Belair spoke about her family tree before explaining that next week, we’ll find out who she is. What is she talking about? SHE’S THE EST OF NXT. We all know this, tell em Percy!
Kairi Sane
In another chapter of this recent feud, Kairi Sane takes on Lacey Evans in the 2nd match of their series. Fittingly, Sane immediately jumped her with a dropkick and after being angered by a hard chop, Kairi shouted in Japanese and took control, even if only briefly. Lacey soon turned the tide and grounded Sane. Sane eventually kicked herself free though and hit a running blockbuster as well as her interceptor spear.
Sliding D in the corner followed and Lacey rolled to the floor but Kairi stayed in control, hitting THE FLYING KABUKI ELBOW from the apron. Sane then came off the top rope but Lacey caught her in mid-air with a vicious right hand and that was that, Evans had just won clean. Wow.
This match was astoundingly good. They fought with immense aggression and just nailed this from a story perspective. Sane is always good though, Evans was the story here.
Grade: A
Lacey Evans
Last week, I was very mean. I poked fun at Ms Evans and within minutes, she made a fool of me with an impressive showcase match. This week though, I must say that I thought she was simply magnificent. Her intensity from the outset was great and the simple cut-off of a spiteful kick to the knee was perfect too. Evans’ work in the heat was very strong too, viciously focusing on the arm and even getting a little creative with the content within.
I don’t love the bronco buster thingy for her character but that’s irrelevant, her approach here was awesome. Technically, she was good and as a personality, she was just excellent and superbly portrayed this feud’s importance to her character. Very impressive performance from a still developing performer, big thumbs up.
Grade: A
We now move to Cathy Kelley in the parking lot. She greets Johnny Gargano and Candice LeRae and asks how Mr Wrestling’s neck is. He says that as a team, they’ve made a decision and he’ll tell the live crowd what it is…TONIGHT!
Up next was a recap of last week’s main event. This suggests that this is actually building to a tag title match….all hail. This led into short promos from Burch & Lorcan as well as The Undisputed Era. Fish & O’Reilly claimed that they didn't even know who those men were. Fun stuff.
Lars Sullivan
Awesome entrance and all, Lars is here to fight two men. He wasn't impressed by Dream’s hip swivel either, and quickly dismissed his attempts at some technical wrestling too. That brought Ricochet in but he was also manhandled, forcing an immediate alliance between Dream and Ricochet. They were successful too, stunning Lars with some cool tandem offense. After losing out to the numbers game for a prolonged period, Sullivan just kept standing himself upright and eventually fought free, pushing Ricochet away before almost decapitating Dream with a big lariat.
He then began to dominate, throwing Dream around and just generally working him over. He then gave Dream some false hope before cutting him off again, this time with a big powerslam for two. He next hit a diving headbutt directly onto Dream’s spine but Ricochet broke the fall and this my friends, is awesome. Ricochet waved Lars on from there before running to safety and making Lars chase him. Sullivan fell into the trap and his foes flurried, stunning Lars with double-team offense.
However, some issues between Dream and Ricochet would get in the way (more on that later) and Lars took advantage, hitting the Freak Accident for the win. In some ways, Lars was more of a storytelling tool here but he came across as so awesome that I can only praise him. This match wasn't about Lars but was yet another indicator of his constant progress.
Grade: B+
Ricochet & Velveteen Dream
Well, this ruled. Firstly these two men bumping fists got a huge pop which very much set the tone. The fact that they were immediately forced into tandem offense was awesome too. They strung together their offense awesomely and at one point, Velveteen did nothing but throw double axe handles for like a minute. I love that man, he’s wonderful. It was kind of weird to see him play Ricky Morton here though. He did well at it regardless even if the stuff he was selling wasn't overly dynamic (not that it really should’ve been).
Another highlight for me was the way that Ricochet led Lars directly into Dream’s elbow drop. I love that in kayfabe, these men are so good at wrestling that they had immediate chemistry as not only did it make for in-ring excitement, it also elevated Lars tremendously that he could even compete with them. Moreover, it was awesome to see how Ricochet adapted his hot tag here. It was much more grounded which worked well and made sense considering that they’d finally got Lars vulnerable.
On that topic, Ricochet stunned the big man with strikes and along with a Dream crossbody, got a 2 count after a standing shooting star press. Dream then almost killed himself but Ricochet followed up with his springboard 450 splash to make things much better. Sadly, Dream then turned on Ricochet with his rolling death valley driver. Beforehand, this was very predictable but the match was so superbly produced that I legitimately got lost in it, and was hurt by Velveteen’s betrayal.
This has to rank very high on my short list of all-time favorite handicap matches…whether you take that as a big compliment or not? I suppose it’s up to you. Seriously though, this was tremendous. Masterfully done. I’m hoping Velveteen will get some genuine heat now too.
Grade: A*
We now find out that next week, Dakota Kai will challenge Shayna Baszler for the women’s title. This then led into a short promo from Kai until Shayna interrupted and did more of that bullying shtick. As usual, it was very good.
Johnny, What Have You Done?
As promised, Johnny Rasslin is now here. First he shook hands with a startled kid and then grabbed a microphone in-ring. Johnny is very sad about what happened to him last month and claims that after sitting down with Candice, he’s realized that it’s time to start thinking about his future. Frankly, he’s unsure if it’s worth it. However, he then decided that it is in fact worth it and quickly pulled of his neck brace.
Now very fired up, Johnny called out Tommaso and this understandably made Candice (and I) very scared. Just as he’d been asked, Ciampa promptly arrived and from what I understand, threatened to actually kill Johnny. Good lord, this is incredible. In the meantime, Candice had run away and now brought a bunch of referees back with her. They stopped the potential fight as Johnny was desperately dragged away by Candice.
This was a truly touching moment. A married couple being pulled apart by a bald man but love kept them safe. Candice just wanted what was best for her husband and what a beautiful thought that is. Not all of Full Sail was so impressed though, with one man demanding that Johnny ignore Candice and go “beat him up.” Gargano seemed set to ignore this wild man but then Ciampa began to mock him (Johnny, not the fan), telling him to listen to his wife “like a good little boy.”
This enraged Johnny who quickly run to the apron but Ciampa immediately bumped him off. That sent Johnny flying into poor Candice, tragically wiping her out on the ramp. Aware of the gravity of what had just happened, Ciampa scurried. Gargano was frozen, pleading for help for his poor wife. This angle was exactly what their feud needed, it was the logical next step and smoothly elevated the stakes of this already engrossing conflict.
Honestly, this is probably one of the best angles I’ve covered since starting the report card and it’s one that’ll stand out when the Ciampa/Gargano saga is revisited. Simple, sublime storytelling.
Grade: A*
Final Thoughts
Recently, one of my critiques of NXT TV was that there was too much going on and for that reason, very little stood out. This week’s show was absolute proof of how smart I am. All three matches got the perfect amount of time which allowed everyone to shine whilst progressing stories neatly. All three matches exceeded their expectations and along with that incredible closing segment, this episode of NXT was about as good as it gets. Everything went well and they went off the air with drama too. TV wrestling perfection.
Grade: A*
